One of the downsides of touring on a budget is that there is no guarantee of a good night's sleep. The Travelodge at Wall's End, just north of Newcastle, was fine on Thursday and Friday nights but on Saturday night the corridor outside my room erupted at about 2am and kept bursting into sudden life until I got up at 7.30. Having taken a wrong turning on the way back from a gig I found myself driving the Norwich Puppet Theatre van through the city centre just as the pubs were closing and the clubs were opening so I had some idea of the state of mind of the lads in the corridor with their 'wayay man' and 'fookin' this and that'.
It seems the idea is to book a room for the night so when you pull you have somewhere to take your new friend. And if all that booze hasn't worked its charm, what do you do with your room? How do you avoid wasting it by falling into a drunken stupor that you may just as well have enjoyed at home? Well apparently there is a craze for taking ecstasy by injecting it into the mouth. And, I kid you not, it is called E by gum.
(My apologies to non-UK readers for whom this is probably neither clever nor funny.)